Off I went, into the night, out to walk up and down Bourbon-not-Bourbon Street in Old Orleans, seeing as how I had to pass the time for a few hours whilst waiting for Mattie 3.0, a character from one of my own stories I had written years earlier who had been defictionalized, to finish his shift at the virtual reality sex-porium where I had gone to get my instructions for the next part of my journey after Captain Sandy had delivered me to what was now a port city of East America.
(And if any of that confuses you, then you must have missed the earlier missives where I explained my trip through the portal created by an app on my cell phone that landed me in 2084.)
I was hesitant to interact with anyone, as I had just been schooled to be careful not to say anything that might pinpoint me as an outsider ... so I made every effort to avoid eye contact as I shuffled about in the shadows.
I had been to New Orleans for a few visits before I jumped through time to land at this re-creation of the town, now situated near what I had known as Tuscaloosa, Alabama -- and now located on the Bay of Mississippi -- the result of drastic geographical changes brought on by the fracking-induced New Madrid Quake of 2023.
The briefing I had gotten on the boat ride from the Florida Isles had prepared me for the successful attempt of the founders to capture the old vibes of the city. The drinking ... the loud music ... the good food ... all of them were fully on display, and there was an air of throwing caution to the wind in order to maximize the fun that was all too familiar to me.
Which is why I was so surprised when the stranger spoke from the alleyway where I had briefly stopped. "They *almost* got it right, eh? But you and I both know that something's off."
An old man stepped out of the shadow and into the dim light that was streaming out from the open doors of a second floor balcony above us.
He continued. "I can see it in your eyes that you know the difference between Old and New when it comes to the two competing towns of Orleans."
Our conversation that night continued ... but I'll have to tell the tale of it on the last day of the month next since the loophole when the VitalNet updates in the final hours of each month is closing. Until our next communication, I remain Ilion -- the new name I've taken on here in 2084 -- communicating with you via Troy in 2018's social media, having been brought to the future by t1a7n72.lif.
Whatever the year is when you are reading this ... stay safe!
Tuesday, July 31, 2018
Monday, July 30, 2018
Random Memorial for Monday 7/30/18
Circumstances were such that I had to cancel my original plans to return to central PA from whence I came (maybe in 2019? maybe for a 30th high school reunion?) -- although, let's face it, had I made it home, I would have had to deal with epic flooding instead of my planned itinerary, so maybe all things work out the way they should ...
Instead, the previous nine days were all about spending extra time with Casanova (who, as you might have heard, recently, and very unexpectedly, lost all of his vision in one eye and most of his vision in the other) and watching movies I hadn't seen in forever (like 'Bedknobs and Broomsticks') or remakes of things I remember from my youth (like 'Chips') ... and don't get me started on the modern marvels 'Paddington' and 'Paddington 2'. By the way -- another key ingredient of this plan? Doing my best to avoid the news (whether the mainstream kind ... or the alternative kind [which I think is what the conspiracy theorists of today prefer to be called]).
Alack and alas, all such things must come to an end, and today I returned to work -- where, happily, none of my passwords had expired (three cheers for single sign-on)! All I can say is that couch-cuddling with the puppies for multiple movie matinees during the traditional work week, you will be missed (at least until the next period of time off when the holiday season rolls around).
ALL HAIL PADDINGTON (THE BEST PART OF MY RECENT COMFORT 'CATION):
https://www.paddington.com/us/
A LITTLE BIT ABOUT THE PHRASE "ALACK AND ALAS":
https://wikidiff.com/alack/alas
HUZZAH FOR THE MIRACLE THAT IS SINGLE SIGN-ON!:
https://www.businessnewsdaily.com/10451-what-is-single-sign-on.html
Sunday, July 29, 2018
Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 7/29/18
... just the usual back to school discussions.
Although, I have to admit that "usual" is a relative term, as we've come a long way since the days of heading off to the local Hills department store for the best deals on clothing -- and, if you were lucky, different colored duotang folders. Plus here in the SoFlo, it's no longer about waiting until after Labor Day for youngsters to have to recalibrate toward being studious again, because the local elementary school that I see on my daily walk has a sign out front that says kids are coming back on August 15th -- in just two weeks. (Note to self: prepare to monitor the front lawn for the purpose of yelling at children to get off of it, as is required of a man of my age.)
Nowadays, it's about scheduling your shopping for whenever the state tax holiday is happening (this upcoming weekend, for us Floridians), previewing what new policies are in place now that schools are being "hardened" (i.e. turned into mini prisons where students get locked in safely and securely in an attempt to minimize the risk of being shot dead somewhere between 'riting and 'rithmetic), and fighting over where to store "the long gun" (i.e. the killing machine) that the "school resource officer" (i.e. the designated killer-killer) now gets to store on campus OR in his (or her?) car -- the options in the aforementioned argument actually happening in a local government nearby with regards to an elementary school.
Like I said -- just the "usual" back to school conversations (and by that, I mean "usual" for the modern era).
WOO HOO! NO SALES TAX THIS WEEKEND!!:
http://floridarevenue.com/backtoschool/Pages/default.aspx
IT'S TIME FOR SOME "HARDENING" OF SOME SCHOOLS!!:
https://www.news4jax.com/news/what-exactly-does-hardening-schools-mean
WHERE GOES THE "LONG GUN" ... MODERN BACK TO SCHOOL PLANNING!!:
https://southfloridagaynews.com/Local/commissioners-discuss-gun-safe-at-wilton-elementary.html
Saturday, July 28, 2018
Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/28/18
... it was ONE honey-nut cheerio.
So why the hell did it attract 400 ants?
Note: the accompanying photo is a "stock" one from the google image search and is only *representative* of what happened on the kitchen floor yesterday -- I swept the actual one out the back door before I thought about taking a snapshot.
Additional note: on said kitchen floor yesterday, it might have only been 40 ants and not 400, but it was many more than I expected.
Lookit -- I understand that, with a kitchen door that opens up right into the wide wild world of Florida flora and fauna, I recognize that a spill in that room is going to likely result in an invasion of the Formicidae kind. I just would have rather that the ants had sent an exploratory expedition instead of the whole damn worker colony. I'd much prefer to sleep soundly thinking that me and my two legs have some kind of superiority over the six legged creatures that really rule the world.
THE YOUTUBE SAYS THOSE ANTS LOVE THE HONEY NUT CHEERIO:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8EHgQzPtIAU
SPEAKING OF ANTS AND CHEERIOS:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5xlQsY-s1U
SO THEY APPARENTLY SMELLED IT AS IT FELL:
https://news.vanderbilt.edu/2012/09/10/ants-have-an-exceptionally-high-def-sense-of-smell/
Monday, July 23, 2018
Random Memorial for Monday 7/23/18
(And, as a reminder, Madge is in the trash because this CD version is also already in the overall music collection, and one has to purge at some time in one's life.)
Of course, if I'm being completely accurate, that might be Miss Dita there in the trash, as ... you know ... she was kind of the hostess for the album. (Yes, I am aware that my referring to it as an album is hinting at my old age -- and kids, albums came before cassettes but after eight-tracks. Ask your grandparents -- or a hipster DJ -- for more info.)
As for the tune I'll choose to feature in honor of this item going the way of the empty yogurt container is one that speaks to *this* day and age the same as it did to the 1992 era when this fifth album of hers was released: 'Why's It So Hard' -- and you needn't be worried that a song with *that* title on an album named 'Erotica' might be pornographic, as she saved that approach and her usage of double entendres (and single entendres) ... for other tracks.
LOVE YOUR SISTER ... LOVE YOUR BROTHER ... NOW!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nnQdzJ_SO-8
Sunday, July 22, 2018
Random Scandal Sheet for Sunday 7/22/18
The same thing that everyone everywhere in Florida is talking about (hopefully): the upcoming midterm elections.
For that matter, my wish is certainly that everyone everywhere in every state is talking about the importance of them .. but for purposes of this post, it's the specific dates for my new home state that are being featured -- especially seeing as how the deadline for registering for the primary is just now a few days away.
To all those who may be voting for the first time, or who may have been the type to sit out voting except for the "big" years, or who don't participate because they believe the conspiracy theorists who promote the propaganda that all elections are rigged in hopes that the franchised will voluntarily disenfranchise themselves because they think their vote doesn't matter ... please know that your vote matters AND that your vote has consequences AND that the old adage about all politics being local has a certain ring of truth to it.
Make sure your paperwork is in order ... then research the races ... and then get ready to VOTE!
HERE COME THE MIDTERMS:
https://www.usa.gov/midterm-state-and-local-elections
HERE COME THE FLORIDA MIDTERMS:
http://dos.myflorida.com/elections/for-voters/election-dates/
WHY THE MIDTERMS MATTER:
http://thehill.com/opinion/campaign/371415-why-the-coming-midterms-are-so-important
Saturday, July 21, 2018
Random Soapbox for Saturday 7/21/18
... the trash people have moved into the house directly behind us, and I'm not happy about it.
Mind you, I understand that it's all relative ... and when you look at this picture of the back yard as it currently exists, you might not even notice that tarp in the distance that is covering up a truck full of ... well ... trash. I zoomed in for the second picture (which will replace my usual links-in-triplicate that often accompany these posts on the blog/on the Facebook), where it's a little more visible.
I also completely understand that there's probably little I can control over what they do back there ('cause ... 'Murica!) -- but I still get steamed that the first thing they did upon moving in was to tear out all the pretty bougainvillea and then remove branch after branch of the trees in their yard ... which I consider more of an affront when I think about how much greenery our yard lost during Irma almost a year ago (greenery that brings all the birds to the yard -- or that USED to, prior to nature and the trash people doing their respective damages).
And if the deforestation and the parking of the truck with the giant pile of trash in the back yard isn't bad enough, there is also an incessant banging at all hours of the night -- at 9pm when it scares the puppies who are doing their post-dinner constitutional routine ... and at 2am when the only type of banging that *should* be happening is the freaky outdoor sex kind. (My best guess for what's going on is that the amateur trash people are of the "scrappers" ilk, and that the noises are the byproduct of "breaking down" their trash into pieces of metal to haul away for money).
My only hope is that the foliage grows back tenfold there in the spot between yards that we call no man's land (which is where the giant golden orb spiders live, by the way) ... or that code enforcement comes a-callin' ...
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